JOKE

The medics rushed Mr. Steinberg to the hospital in the middle of the night, apparently due to a massive heart attack.

The doctors work on him all night and morning and finally discharge him to the Intensive Care Unit, where therapy continues.

After a couple of days, Mr. Steinberg’s physician comes into his room and says, “Sol, I’m happy to tell you that you are completely well. You have the heart function that you did when you were a fifteen-year-old lad. We’re going to send you home tomorrow. You don’t have to worry about your heart; do any physical exercise that you like.”

Mr. Steinberg goes home and that evening is talking with his wife.

“Doris, you’ll never believe it! I’m completely well. I have no worries with my heart. Tonight, Darling, you and I are going to make love like you’ve never had before – wild, passionate sex! You’ll love it!”
Doris thinks for a minute and says, “I don’t know, Sol. I’ve heard about active sex and heart conditions. I don’t want it to be on my conscience if you die while we are making love. Maybe, just maybe, if your doctor wrote a note to me saying that everything was okay, maybe I would have such sex with you.”

His doctor tells him, “Sure, sure, Sol, no problem, I’ll write the note. Let’s see, here’s my prescription pad: ‘Mr. Sol Steinberg, a patient of mine, has the heart function of a fifteen-year-old lad, and can have mad, passionate, adventurous sex any time that he so desires, signed, Dr. Aaron Katz.’ Now, I’ll just address this. By the way, Sol, what’s your wife’s first name?”

“Uh, Doctor, could you just make that, ‘To Whom It May Concern’?”

PETULANT

petulant •

Pronunciation: pe-chê-lênt • Hear it!

Part of Speech: Adjective

Meaning: Irascible, hot-headed, easily or too quickly angered by petty annoyances.

Notes: Today’s Good Word comes with a substantial family of derivatives: an adverb, petulantly, and a choice of two nouns, petulance or petulancy. Like all English adjectives ending on NT, this one forms its noun by replacing the T with CE. The suffix -y may be added for good measure should you need an extra syllable, if you first remove the final E. Look out for the spelling -ant. It is difficult to keep track of which adjective with this (same) suffix is spelled with an E or an A. This one is spelled with an A.

In Play: Today’s word is distinguished from anger in that it is anger that arises too quickly over a trivial issue: “Don’t mention what the wind did to Harriet’s hairdo; you know how petulant she is.” Petulance is a bit milder than flying off the handle; it is a rather moderate anger: “I thought the senator’s petulance toward the press was well expressed and well deserved.”

AN INTERESTING HAPPINESS STUDY

 Secret to a Good Life According to the Longest Happiness Study Ever

BY  THE LIVESTRONG.COM TEAM  MARCH 17, 2018

You didn’t think that true satisfaction was determined by your social-media following and bank account, did you? Well, you’re right. According to the 75-year-long Harvard Study of Adult Development, the most important predictor of true happiness and well-being is the right kind of relationships with family, friends and spouses.

Study director Dr. Robert Waldinger — who also happens to be a Zen priest and professor of psychiatry at Harvard — explains his team’s findings: “The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.” In a TED Talk from last 2016, Waldinger noted that fostering and maintaining strong relationships helped protect against mental illness, chronic disease and memory decline.

Read more: 9 Ways to Ensure Your Relationship Is Built to Last

According to Waldinger, “The chronic stress of being lonely, of being unhappy, gets into the body and breaks it down over time.” But the secret to well-being isn’t constantly surrounding yourself with people and locking down a romantic partner. The truth is, you can be lonely in a crowd as well as in a romantic partnership in which you and your partner are emotionally distant. “It’s not the number of relationships, but the quality and depth of relationships that matters,” Waldinger explains.

So we know strong relationships lead to health and happiness, but how do we cultivate those quality relationships? “Giving people our full, undivided attention is one of the most important things we have to offer,” says Waldinger. That means disconnecting from your electronic devices when you’re in the presence of your friends and family and prioritizing interpersonal relationships over money and notoriety.

But just how in-depth is the Harvard Study of Adult Development? The Grant and Glueck study followed 724 men for three-quarters of a decade to identify the psychosocial predictors of healthy aging. The study tracked two very different groups: 456 men from inner-city Boston and 268 Harvard grads, including president John F. Kennedy. The researchers collected blood samples, conducted brain scans and analyzed self-reported surveys and actual interactions with the participants.

Read more: Meet the Women Who Are Changing Health and Fitness

The Harvard researchers are now beginning to study the children of the men and women in the Grant and Glueck study. According to the Second Generation Study website: “Our new project aims to study the effect of childhood experiences on midlife health. We aim to use our rich data set to create a detailed model of how early events help shape our well-being in midlife.” We’ll have to wait to find out if our childhoods shape who we are and how happy we are as adults.

—Erin Mosbaugh

Erin has made telling stories about food her profession. You can find those stories in Food & Wine, LA Weekly, Serious Eats, KCET, Robb Report and First We Feast.

What Do YOU Think?

Do you prioritize relationships over work? Do you value being with people in the moment over social media? Do you believe strong, thoughtful relationships lead to true happiness?

WE ALL NEED TO WORK ON OUR MEMORY

Remember To Work On Keeping Your Memory

American mathematician Norbert Wiener had a reputation for being a little absent-minded. According to one story, when his family moved to a new Massachusetts home, his wife insisted on supervising every detail of the move because she couldn’t depend on Wiener to remember the important details – like their new address.
Wiener went to work on the day of the move with a piece of paper his wife had given him; on it was written his new address. During the course of the day he used the paper to work out an equation and then discarded it. At the end of the day Wiener returned home to his old address, now an empty house.
At the door he suddenly remembered that his family had moved, but he had no idea where his new home was. Spotting a little girl riding her bike down the street, he called out, “Excuse me, I’m Professor Norbert Wiener, and I’ve just moved. Would you by any chance know what my new address is?”
The young girl replied, “Hi, Daddy! Mom said you’d forget.”
According to Wikipedia, memory is the faculty of the mind by which information is encoded, stored and retrieved. The good news is that memory can be improved. There are many ways that you can train yourself to have a better memory.
Like every other skill, it takes practice and a commitment to improve. Many of my friends think my memory is terrific, but they don’t know my tricks. Like most people, I forget 50 percent of what I hear within hours, so I make a point of writing things down.
I also have a special phone dictation line at my office. I can call it 24 hours a day, seven days a week and leave all sorts of messages, letters, notes and so on. And I don’t go anywhere without my iPhone, paper and pen. I am constantly writing myself notes and leaving them where I can find them. I’ve been known to put notes on my steering wheel and dash in my car, on my office chair and phone at work. I put them on the floor by my bed so I see them when I wake up in the morning, on my bathroom mirror or in my sink.
Name association is another arrow in my quiver. When I meet someone and want to remember their name, I associate names of other famous people with the same names and repeat them over and over to myself. Similarly, to help me with phone numbers, I think about how I can connect the number to a significant date or event. Repetition aids retention. I repeat things over and over, which helps me remember names, phone numbers and key statistics. Also I’ve learned that if I write things down enough, I will remember them.  A study by UCLA researchers found that older people can improve their brain function after just 14 days of following some simple, healthy lifestyle strategies. Incorporating healthful food, physical activity, stress reduction and memory exercises seem to help improve cognitive function.
Here are some of the health strategies participants worked into their daily routines:

Memory exercises, such as crossword puzzles and brain teasers were worked on throughout the day.

Five small meals a day in order to prevent drops in blood glucose levels, because glucose is the main source of energy for the brain. Participants also ate diets rich in omega-3 fats, anti-oxidants and low glycemic carbohydrates like whole grains.

Daily relaxation exercises to prevent the release of cortisol, a hormone that can impair memory and damage memory cells.

Daily walks.Up until about 10-15 years ago, it was believed that we were born with a fixed number of brain cells that eventually died out. Now scientists know that brain cells regenerate throughout our lives. And one thing seems clear: To keep the sharpest memory you can for as long as you can, get moving. Aerobically, that is. Studies have shown that people who engage in aerobic exercise perform better cognitively and show increased brain volume. In another study, participants who exercised showed lower rates of dementia. That’s because exercise actually encourages neuron generation in the part of the brain that processes memories.
Back to the absent minded professor. He observed to a colleague, “People attach much too much importance to memory.”
“I disagree,” said his colleague.
“Disagree with what?” asked the professor.